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TOP 10 SHIT XMAS NUMBER ONES

• TOP 10 SHIT XMAS NUMBER ONES

• TOP 10 SHIT XMAS NUMBER ONES

  StrumSolo > 02/12/2013, 13:51

  It's almost that time of year again...
  
  10. Matt Cardle - When We Collide (2010)
  
  
  
  Originally a half-decent Biffy Clyro song called Many Of Horror, any sense of mild peril was stripped away by changing the title and sticking Cardle on vocals. Yawn.
  
  
  9. Mr Blobby - Mr Blobby (1993)
  
  
  
  It might be Blobby's name up top, but it was Edmonds pulling the strings. All downhill from here though.
  
  
  8. Cliff Richard - Mistletoe & Wine (1988)
  
  
  
  Fuck off, Cliff.
  
  
  7. The Spice Girls - Goodbye (1998)
  
  
  
  The Spice Girls' 3rd Christmas chart-topper in a row, this. And thankfully, their last.
  
  
  6. St Winifred's School Choir - There's No One Quite Like Grandma (1980)
  
  
  
  Fun fact: After hitting the big time at such a young age, 73% of the singers in this video are, or have at some stage, received treatment for drug and alcohol dependency. Caulkin-esque.
  
  
  5. Bob The Builder - Can We Fix It? (2000)
  
  
  
  He was on Cowboy Builders the other week. So next time you're singing along to this, think of poor ol' Melinda Messenger having to flash the big'uns in exchange for a free futon.
  
  
  4. Michael Jackson - Earth Song (1995)
  
  
  
  The God-complex first evident in Man In The Mirror, and later Heal The World, reaches it's logical conclusion. Dick.
  
  
  3. Westlife - I Have A Dream (1999)
  
  
  
  I had a dream once. It involved Westlife being impaled on their own up-turned stools. Good dream.
  
  
  2. Shayne Ward - That's My Goal (2005)
  
  
  
  One week in November 2005, Shayne Ward did some sponsored driveway tarmac-ing for Children In Need. His goal was 20 in 5 days, and he succeeded, raising £361.70 in the process.
  
  
  1. Leon Jackson - When You Believe (2007)
  
  
  
  Nope, me neither.

• RE: TOP 10 SHITTEST XMAS NUMBER ONES

  Outlaw87 > 02/12/2013, 14:00

  (02/12/2013, 13:51)ScottyRampant Wrote: It's almost that time of year again...
  
  10. Matt Cardle - When We Collide (2010)
  
  
  
  Originally a half-decent Biffy Clyro song called Many Of Horror, any sense of mild peril was stripped away by changing the title and sticking Cardle on vocals. Yawn.

  
  He totally murdered this great song, can't believe Biffy Clyro let him in all honesty

• RE: TOP 10 SHITTEST XMAS NUMBER ONES

  Clitterbug > 02/12/2013, 14:13

  Oh Scotty some real 'Crackers' there m8, but i cant agree with your Cliff bashing! he is Christmas personified!
  
  Christmas time, missing toes in wine
  Dumb carol singers signing or mime?
  The dogs on the fire
  For pissing up the tree
  A time to read Joyce, Ulysses on your knee.

• RE: TOP 10 SHITTEST XMAS NUMBER ONES

  RussyRover > 02/12/2013, 14:20

  To be honest, I'll take Blobby, blobby, blobby anytime of the year in place of that god-awful tripe that X-factor tries to force feed down our necks year after year...
  Noel Edmonds or Simon Cowell!!! Edmonds everytime...

• RE: TOP 10 SHIT XMAS NUMBER ONES

  Clitterbug > 02/12/2013, 14:58

  
  'The Nightmare Before Christmas' Tim Burton does a porno!

• RE: TOP 10 SHIT XMAS NUMBER ONES

  thewolfman > 02/12/2013, 20:50

  (02/12/2013, 14:13)clitterbug Wrote: Oh Scotty some real 'Crackers' there m8, but i cant agree with your Cliff bashing! he is Christmas personified!
  
  Christmas time, missing toes in wine
  Dumb carol singers signing or mime?
  The dogs on the fire
  For pissing up the tree
  A time to read Joyce, Ulysses on your knee.

  
  Cliff is a bit like sprouts at Christmas. you have to have your dose on the big day whether you like them or not and they have both produced tons of shit over the years!!!

• RE: TOP 10 SHIT XMAS NUMBER ONES

  Clitterbug > 03/12/2013, 13:33

  
  
  
  
  Go on then i DARE YOU i very fucking dare you!
  
  Even the Archbishop couldnt exlpain it to Popeye!
  

• RE: TOP 10 SHIT XMAS NUMBER ONES

  RussyRover > 03/12/2013, 14:07

  This was obviously Harry's very own prayer to ensure his speedy entry through the pearly gates once his time doth cometh, other than that I can't help but think it needed some very large coloured ladies in swirling robes as backing singers - that would have made much more sense...
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