Dude has surgery after shoving 6 kidney beans up his dick

[ReedeFox]

Here we go again, another pleb forcefully shoving any object down his cock and not giving a second thought to the consequences. This time we’re heading over to Michigan where a 30 year old man decided to stuff 6 kidney beans up his cock in the hopes that he could spit them out like a gun when he jizzed. Erm, what?!


 
I’m not entirely sure how he was hoping to achieve the kidney bean pew pewing but lo and behold his plan backfired spectacularly and he ended up with 6 kidney beans firmly wedged in his pipe. Bizarrely, the guy admitted that he had in fact achieved the kidney bean trick once before but with only 5 kidney beans. It’s only when he upped the ante to 6 that things went south. Got a bit too cocky there didn’t you, mate?!

 

After trying to get the beans out of his knob with tweezers he eventually admitted defeat and took himself to his local hospital. Here’s what the official case report said about it: 
 

We present the case of a 30-year-old man who had self-inserted six kidney beans into his urethra for sexual pleasure. Conservative attempts at removal with bedside interventions were unsuccessful.

The patient required operative intervention with cystoscopy and urethral foreign body retrieval. Upon further evaluation, it was revealed that earlier in the day he had inserted six kidney beans into his urethra for sexual pleasure with the intent of expressing the beans during ejaculation.

He further explained that this was not his first time participating in this practice, although he never attempted to utilize this many beans.Using a combination of graspers and basketing, each bean was removed separately. The final bean was encountered within the bladder. This was also basketed and removed.

 
I guess we’ve all learned a valuable lesson here haven’t we - Don’t stick kidney beans down your dick!