Boris Johnson channels his inner Trump & vows to "make Britain great"

[ReedeFox]

Worryingly, it looks like Tory moron Boris Johnson is in line to be the next Prime Minister so we may as well pack up and move away while there is still time!



If he were to become PM, Boris has said he wants to deliver Brexit, boost police numbers on the streets of Britain and keep Jeremy Corbyn the hell away from Number 10. Here's what Bozzer had to say: 
 

It’s time to drive for the line, keeping the ball at the back of the scrum. I’m fighting for every vote and campaigning flat out and will be from now until the end.

I will set out a vision for Britain as the greatest place on Earth. The greatest place to be, the greatest place to live, to raise a family.
The greatest place to send your kids to school, the greatest place to breathe clean air, to start a business, the place where you’ll find the most exciting tech scene, the most exciting academic culture, the most cutting-edge businesses of all kinds, but also a place where we improve the environment, we improve quality of life for everybody, because we’re uniting the country and bringing it together, that’s what I want to do.

Here's a list of Boris' promises. If it's anything like his last promise of £350 million to the NHS then we'll be lucky to see a few dozen extra coppers:

• Put 20,000 extra police officers on the streets of Britain.
  
• Harsher penalties for violent criminals and knife-carriers, and ensure they serve full sentences in prison. 
  
• Deliver Brexit by October 31. 
  
• Revive the “left behind” areas of the North and Midlands by delivering new rail networks.
  
• Increase per-pupil funding in primary and secondary schools and boost funding for further education.
  
• Full fibre broadband all over the UK.
  
• Cut stamp duty to get housing market moving and free up homes for first-time buyers.
  
• Prevent ‘the horror of a Corbyn government’. 
  
• Help people on the lowest incomes with a programme of tax cuts and economic reform.
  
• Generate growth and confidence in the UK.
  
• Encourage immigrants to learn English so as to better integrate into the UK.
  

So Boris wants to 'make Britain great again'? I wonder what 'MBGA' will look like on a hat?! TBF that's the least of out worries. Fucking circus!