GUY ARRESTED AFTER SNIFFING 5 LINES OF COKE & HAVING A WANK IN PUB BEER GARDEN

[ReedeFox]

A guy from Blackburn has been arrested after being caught banging 5 lines of charlie up his shnozz and having a 40 minute wank in the pub beer garden.

Blackburn magistrates court heard that Michael Brian Scott had been drinking all afternoon and sniffed 5 lines of gear before dropping his trousers to give himself a hand shandy. It didn't go down well with his fellow patrons though as they swiftly called the police to Clitheroe Kate’s on Mincing Lane. Clitheroe Kate's? Seriously? Surely the only think to do in a pub with 'clit' in the title is wank?! Although 40 minutes is a bit excessive. Most dudes I know are done within a minute. Maybe the chang numbed the feeling in his todger.

[FantasticMR]

We've all been there with regards to and overly long wank or 5 at the mercy of a bit of binge. You think if you get one off of the wrist then it will help you sleep and knocking your floppy shrunken boy around will take the best part of at least 30 minutes. It never works first time around so you have to try round 2 where your penis is even more decrepit and it takes even longer. 

He was clearly twatted enough to think that the pub garden was fine and maybe it was his 1st ever coke wank and he didn't realise just how long it would take him.

[Hilary Briss]

Political correctness gone mad.

[parkaner]

Take a closer look at the number plate of the car just outside the door



A MOB DEN ?

[StrumSolo]

Take a closer look at the number plate of the car just outside the door

A MOB DEN ?

Wow.

Looks like this one goes deeper than we thought.  Be careful out there everybody.

[burns72]

40 mins for one that's probably 5/6 for some hardened Rampant members, a few puns there but seriously even a 12 hour booze binge I have never thought a beer garden is safe to fertilize the grass with my jizz! Never tried charlie so not qualified to say if it would get me horny enough to bash the bishop in public!

[JamezZ]

I wonder if this is somehow linked with that study you posted about alcohol and coke. They are now exploring the relation between alcohol, coke and wanking. Can't wait for the results.